I have a Blog...........Really!

Hello fellow bloggers who may or may not moonlight as taxi drivers/wasps.  It is I emm...... what am I called again, oh yeah Alice or is it Alan, I'm going to go with Juliet, HIIIIIII.

So yes I know, I have been absent for a while now but guys my beautiful, scrawny, disabled Faerie has not shown up yet not even on Valentines Day!! but I still haven't found a virgin to sacrifice yet so maybe that's why Its ignoring, uhhhhhhhhhhhhh I hate will they or won't they scenario's but that's life (insert French aphorism here).

I've got nothing really else to report except that  REDACTED and I had tea party with the other bound last week, it was ok except that Ms Snowman got drunk and puked everywhere so we got ejected from the spaceship.

So I guess I'll keep researching for a few virgins and I have to say Hi to all my friends, Hello ELIRR, how are you, I hope you have been keeping out of trouble (:, emm Hello to North who I think has become a functioning human now, hello to Ridley and his silly name (: and finally hello to Sin, who I think is an assassin, Ha ha how glamorous, an assassin what will they think of next.  Oh Mr/Ms Sin if you are reading this, are you a virgin because I need one, thanks a thousand (:.

And finally, has anyone thing major happened or has anyone died because I may be able to harvest some souls oh and REDACTED says hi.

I haven't eaten a Faerie in ages...(:

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII Guys, sorry I have not updated in a while, there is a myriad number of reasons fro my much missed absence but I'm just going to say I went on a killing spree and then got bored because you can only stab someone a certain amount of times.

Soooo anywho and a bucket, I have not been really active in searching for the underachieving possibly intellectually challenged Slenderman you guys are so afraid of, but I'm back with a vengeance (and also because I ran out of Alcohol), so I decided when I find Slenderman, I am going to devour him, that way his essence will attract the cleverer Slendermen from his graduation class who will obviously want to protect their retarded brethren (: see I think ahead but if they don't think that way well then hopefully I'll have Slenderman powers so I can rob banks and become Dr Octopus (:!!!!!!!!!!!!

However guys, there is one problem, since I have not found that stupid Faerie ( It must have a really bad sense of direction) I'm going to need a sacrifice to offer to him, that's where you guys come in.  I'll need a virgin because monsters love virgins (I personally have never noticed any difference in taste) so I'm going to pick North because ELIRR sounds like a serial rapist so North if you have any free time, swing by Ireland for a bot of cutting out heart and monopoly if not get one of the proxies because they are obviously very......lonely (preferably Ridley because he seems really  "Lonely") if you can do this thanks I LOVE YOU (:

Oh and REDACTED thinks this is stupid but its opinion doesn't matter because it is bound to a teddy bear

The One Where Aaron Analyses A Past Experience

Hey guys, I think I might have found a link between the Slenders and I (:

So after that disatorous time at the playground, I decided to start trying to contact him through my dreams, thinking since Slenderman is obviously an omnipotent being he could easily enter someone's dreams.  How and ever when I was getting ready to begin this elaborate process, I suddenly had a flashback to my youth and a possible encounter with The Fear Caol.

So I remebered that when I was a little girl, I had this teddy bear called REDACTED.  So REDACTED and I used to do everything together like have tea parties, comb our barbies hair, set people on fire, cool shit like ,but then one day after we had finished throwing piss ballons at Mr Clandestine's car, REDACTED and I climbed a tree and we were sitting there watching the sunset when I looked down and saw a strange man staring at us.  I thought nothing of it since when you live around here you get ised to strange men staring at you but REDACTED started freaking out and screaming at the man to get out of here and that he was not welcome here, so I was obviously intrigued by this man, I said "Hi" but he was like"......" so I thought he was a big freak.  I jumped down from the tree and said again "Hello" but he just kept staring at me so I just said "Ok I'm going to go because you're obviously a fucking freak!!" so I went home and had  an absolutely orgasmic dinner and went to bed, although REDACTED would'nt talk to me because it was in a pissed off humour.

After having my contractually obligated flashback I began to jot down some ides about the strange man and made some questions about it; Who was he? why was REDACTED so angry at his presence? Was he a Slenderman (not the retarded one you guys know but an actual one who graduated from his class and knew the meaning of "espionage") Was he just a strange old man? I wonder if I a do a backflip? Does Mrs Precode have a bad leg or is she full of shit? etc etc blah blah blah

I do have a question for you "runners" and "proxies" For the proxies "why did you join Slendy?" For you runners "why didn't you join Slendy?" Thanks mates (:

Oh Slendy why don't you love me

First off, thank you ELiRR for showing me that blog called "The Tutorial" that told me some of the rules of escaping the Slenderman,  I would have read more but I saw a butterfly fly by, a fucking butterfly!!! come on lads you can't blame for skipping after it.

So anyway I began my valiant quest by breaking all the rules those "runners" have come up with.  So I went into a wooded part of where I lived and stood beside this old rickety looking tree, though it could have been an old person I can't really tell the difference.  I resisted the urge to climb the tree/old person because apparently Slenders can't perceive height, I don't why he/she/it can't perceive height but I'm going to assume that it is a retarded Slenderman that was put in the slow class, OH and it was beside a playground which it is like an added bonus because Slendy apparently loves to gobble up kids so YES!! I was set.

But as you can imagine I was stood up yeah stood up by something that cannot perceive height!!!!!!  I cannot believe that prick had the audacity to not show up after I made the effort to fuck all the rules......Bastard!!!

So here's me in a park surrounded by the paedophile patrol that actually asked me to leave and I was like "this is a public place, I have as much right to be here as you and your little mistake!!" didn't go too well as they got the park attendants to throw me out, so I said goodbye to my tree( which might have been dead but probably just shit itself) and walked home disappointed that Slenderella didn't show up but oh well there's always tomorrow (:
Oh and this is to Ridley, I found a nice place for our date, its this Italian dinner place that does lovely pizza, I think you will love it and Ben you can go to because you seem like a lonely depressed shut in who needs to PARTY!!! Slan meine freunde!!

Gonna go catch me a Slenderman

Found away to alleviate my boredom, a little too qucikly hmmm........
Anyway I'm gonna go find a/the Slenderman........yeah that's pretty much it.
  How did I go about looking for this Creature, well handsome voice inside my head, I did what my mother always told me too , I became a nosy prick and asked around.  I went onto a couple of random blogs which detail how they found the Slenderman, how they wer attacked etc etc and asked the same annoying repetitive question; Where is the Slenderman.  The reaction was to be expected, most just told me to fuck off or don't be disrespectful (naturally) one guy emailed me and told me to stand on a railway track (: (but then told me it was all lies and  hallucinations which is kind of cool because who does'nt love a hallucination) but don't worry I still continue on my quest to find the Slenderman!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Boredy Mcboredeson

So First blog, first post, should be fun.
As you can probably see from the extremely emo title, I'm bored and since this blog is going to be about my valiant quest to defeat boredom whoever might be reading this might be bored too and will only get even more bored as they read through this boring blog and then we can all wallow in boredom together, hooray.
6 variations of the word bored, slow down Aaron don't want to get too excited.  So if you're still reading this you need to get a life and thank you for joining my quest to try and find something or someone to alleviate my boredom.